The Promises

This is the first time I have really read through the promises.  Talking with someone last night, I was going over how I am feeling now.  Especially compared to 3 months ago.  Even 1 month ago.  

I am content.  I pray every morning.  I pray every night.  I pray in between.  I don't get angry, or at least as angry, when people cut me off in traffic.  Today, instead of yelling at someone being a poop head on the road, I simply said, "that was not very nice, Mr. Red Car."  Then I kind of laughed at myself.  I didn't get tense or angry.

I say the Serenity Prayer a lot.  I say it with my kiddos.  I try to live my life the way I feel God is leading me. 

I am starting to know serenity.

I will let nothing come between me and my sobriety.  I love waking up and not being hung over.  I love waking up early and feeling like making breakfast for my kids.

I love being creative again.  And comfortable (mostly) in my own skin.  I love that I have lost nearly 30lbs.

I love that I feel confident enough in my spirituality I am able to recommend to my husband that he should stop and pray.

I am starting to forgive.

Forgive my biological mom.  My uncle.  My family.  

I have always said everything that has happened to me, happened for a reason.  As much as it is horrible to be sexually abused as a child, I wouldn't have been able to know what it is truly like to NEED to forgive someone.  Not for their sake, but for my own.  And I embrace it.  I want to forgive everyone.  I want to move on and not dwell.  I'm so tired of dwelling.  

I am embracing all of these promises.  I see them working already.

I am so blessed.  So. Incredibly. Blessed. 

If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are half way through.

We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness.

We will not regret the past, nor wish to shut the door on it.

We will comprehend the word serenity,
and we will know peace.

No matter how far down the scale we have gone,
we will see how our experience can benefit others.

That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear.

We will lose interest in selfish things and
gain interest in our fellows.

Self-seeking will slip away.

Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change.

Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us.

We will intuitively know how to handle situations
which used to baffle us.

We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us
what we could not do for ourselves.